I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize