I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
