do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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