if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
