do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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