what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Even my vagina gasped.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
