Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I am full of burrito and curiosity
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Just high enough for therapy.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
