I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize