Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize