May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
