i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
