Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
