flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
as a side note pls kill me
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
