their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
