I want to make a zoo with you.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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