the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I wish i was in the wii world.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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