Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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