he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
