I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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