He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize