U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
