Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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