Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
