Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize