what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
