Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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