he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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