I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
