Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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