ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
My ass is underappreciated
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
