So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
