you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
