i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
