his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
