That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Who died my cat blue again?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Randomize
