He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
