"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
