we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize