Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
