I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize