we have officially lost it.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
