Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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