I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Randomize
