I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
