watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
