I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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