4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Randomize
