you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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