all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Randomize
