is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
